Posted on by mtchayko

Crossing the Atlantic

Betsy leaves for Europe on the ocean liner S.S. Columbic, which will take her and her traveling companions, the Wilsons, to Genoa, where she will transfer to Munich. Immediately she becomes homesick and heartsick, for she catches a glimpse of Joe covering the ship’s departure for the newspaper, though they do not cross paths. She will be reminded of Joe constantly on her travels; it is obvious that she is still very much in love with him.

Betsy disguises her sadness as seasickness and spends a day or so in her cabin, in bed, miserable. But soon her instinct for companionship and adventure beckons, and she avails herself of ship events (dinners, dances, strolls on deck) and excursions (Madeira, the Azores, Algiers). Before long she has met Taylor and Rosa, actual ladies’ maids, like the ones she has written about; the ebullient Mr. O’Farrell, who looks like her favorite singer Chauncey Olcott; a great new friend from Toronto named Maida; and the famous author Mrs. Main-Whittaker.

The early 1900s represented a kind of golden age of translatlantic ocean travel. Ocean liners were spacious, loaded with amenities, and could accommodate over 1,000 travelers. Most trips overseas took a little less than a week. By the 1950s, ocean liners became rare due to the rise of air travel, and the now super-popular cruise ship industry was born.

Dinner conversations on the ocean liner range from art to music to a women’s right to vote. Mr. O’Farrell is shocked that sweet Betsy considers herself a suffragette. “We’re having a suffrage parade in Minneapolis this spring,” she says. “I’d be marching if I were there.”

“But you’re not a militant?” O’Farrell responds. Betsy isn’t sure that she would characterize herself such. But she knows that she would never back down when presented with such a challenge as voting rights. “I would be if I had to be,” she declares (p. 73, Harper Trophy paperback edition, 1996).

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On the ocean liner as a primary means of transportation, see: https://transportgeography.org/contents/chapter1/emergence-of-mechanized-transportation-systems/liner-transatlantic-crossing-time/

For an interesting depiction of life on a translatlantic ocean liner in Betsy’s era, see: https://www.ggarchives.com/OceanTravel/TravelGuide/31-WhatToExpectOnYourVoyage.html

Posted on by mtchayko

Proposal, Engagement, Wedding, Honeymoon

The S.S. Richmond sails into New York City’s inner harbor in September of 1917, signaling the end of Betsy’s travels abroad, and Joe is there to meet her. They reunite ecstatically, rushing into one another’s arms, and their future is immediately sealed, all past slights forgotten. They spend the day touring the city and buying a wedding ring at Tiffany’s, and Joe proposes in a small Greenwich Village restaurant. “Love me always, Betsy!” he cries. “I have given my whole heart to you” (p. 23, Harper Trophy paperback edition, 1996).

Joe quits his job in Boston and packs up his life to return to Minneapolis, for Betsy does not want to leave her family so soon after a year away. He returns within a week, expecting to find a job at one of the city newspapers, but without one immediately available, takes a position working for the Hawthorne Publicity Bureau. He asks Mr. Ray for Betsy’s hand in marriage, and it is decided that Betsy and Joe will marry the very next day, which will give them three days for a honeymoon before Joe starts his new job that Monday.

A small home wedding is hastily arranged, complete with a store-bought dress for Betsy, a cake homemade by Anna, and a bridal bouquet of pink roses and blue forget-me-nots. Small home weddings were common in 1917, usually held in the afternoon, followed by refreshments, as with this wedding. The dress was often simple and flowing, and the wedding ring was often a simple gold band, just like Betsy’s. In the modern era, weddings are likely to be customized to reflect the tastes and budget of the bride and groom and their families, with a wide range of ways to celebrate, including destination weddings, avant-garde gatherings, elopements, and commitment ceremonies that do not constitute an official wedding.

After so many years of loving him (p. 57, Harper Trophy paperback edition, 1996), Betsy and Joe are married in front of the Ray fireplace. Tacy and Harry Kerr, who have married and are expecting a baby, loan Betsy and Joe their cottage on Lake Minnetonka for a honeymoon, and Betsy and Joe spend a few idyllic days planning their life. It’s a simple but perfect beginning to what will be a rewarding but challenging first year of marriage.

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For more on weddings in Betsy’s era, see: https://bungalowclub.org/newsletter/spring-2019/now-join-hands/

For more on modern weddings, see https://www.courtly.com/resources/wedding-ettiquette

Posted on by mtchayko

Betsy and Joe’s Marriage

Betsy and Joe find an apartment and settle into it and into their marriage. Betsy makes a list of rules for married life for herself centered mostly around being a good wife, housekeeper, and cook, which she expects to be her greatest challenge, and one that she approaches with grit and determination. Maintaining house and home was the responsibility of women back then, and while women have more freedom today, to some extent the expectations underlying those norms remain. Total gender equality has certainly not been reached, nor has pay equity. But a true partnership is more possible today, as are same-sex marriages, in which household labor is not divided by gender.

Still, Betsy and Joe approach their marriage as a partnership, which, for that era, it was. He supports her writing and helps her make time for it. He is attentive to her needs and feelings. They treat one another with care and respect. While their sex life is only implied, it is obvious that they find one another highly attractive and sexy, and that Joe is especially fond of the pink silk lingerie that he periodically asks her to put on.

Their easy work-leisure routine is interrupted by the request of Joe’s Aunt Ruth to come live with them. They decide to buy a house so as to have the space to accommodate her. While Betsy is initially unhappy and worried that a new arrival (that isn’t a baby) would be disruptive to their lives, she comes to love Aunt Ruth and accept her presence in their home.

Joe takes a job working late night hours at the paper for more money, and finds himself struggling with the work and with his colleagues. He is increasingly moody and sometimes shuts himself off from Betsy. But they continue to support one another’s wellbeing, hopes, and dreams, and their love deepens.

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On women’s rights and marriage, see: https://www.law.georgetown.edu/georgetown-law-journal/in-print/volume-108/nineteenth-amendment-edition/reconstructing-liberty-equality-and-marriage-the-missing-nineteenth-amendment-argument/#:~:text=The%20social%20movement%20that%20led,as%20to%20women%20as%20citizens.